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Melania Trump Programmer Apologises For Software Malfunction

Following her speech at the RNC, Melania Trump has received considerable heat about whether she plagiarised her speech. But it turns out the future First Cyborg of the USA simply needed a sotware update...
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Wednesday, July 20, 2016 - 17:24

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Melania Trump has made headlines following a supposedly plagiarised speech at the Republican National Convention. Many are wondering why the speech was stolen from a similar speech given by Michelle Obama in 2008. But earlier today, the technicians and programmers who created Melania for Donald Trump several years ago have come out and explained exactly what was up.

Peter Peterson, a software engineer at DNA Robotics, a popular manufacturer of androids and cyborgs has explained that Melania’s latest software update malfunctioned. More precisely:

Melania is technically a THX1138 cybernectic organism, who requires annual software updates. The problem is, Melania’s system has been in overdrive due to the sheer amount of data she has to absorb given her involvement in the US presidential election.

According to Mr Peterson, her latest update prior to her speech didn’t come through and her OS reverted to compiling a speech from a previous future first lady (Thus the use of Michelle Obama’s speech.)

Although the above statement does explain why all this happened, many people are now more curious as to why exactly Donald Trump’s wife is a cyborg. Mr Trump was questioned about this and had this to say:

“I gotta tell ya, she’s a phenomenal cyborg. The best, and believe me, I know a lotta cyborgs. A lotta cyborgs are good friends of mine… what this country needs is more cyborgs. And that’s what I’ll be doing, bringing more cyborg’s to this country…”

A more pertinent question now is, if Donald Trump wins the election, does that make Melania a first lady or a first 1010110100100101000101001000101.

Take your mind of the coming robot apocalypse and take a look at how all this happened courtesy of The Daily Show:

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