Pizza Delivery Robot Eats Garlic Bread And Smokes Joint Before Delivering Cold Pizza
New Zealand is set to become the first country to trial a robot pizza delivery boy. The delivery robot has four wheels, is driverless and has pizza box-sized compartments.
However trials of the DRU (Domino's Robotic Unit) have raised concerns about the efficiency of the system after the robot ended up eating all the garlic bread it was meant to deliver, and was caught smoking marijuana while letting the pizza get cold.
Developers from the robotics company behind the device said they were unsure what was causing the malfunction. According to Adam Murphy, head programmer, "We've looked through all of the code and hardware, it appears the AI responds to the task of delivering pizza the same way a human delivery boy would"
Analysts have claimed the program was designed to be too realistic. The make up of the robot has programmed into it: a high sense of entitlement, apathy towards its superiors and a sense that it's purpose is only temporary.
One thing that has puzzled developers however is how exactly the DRU sources the weed it's been smoking. "We keep the unit locked away overnight, and during the day it's under strict supervision by our team..." at this point, Adam trailed off and mumbled under his breath: "...we do let it roam the streets between 11pm and midnight but surely it doesn't... no further questions."
Other issues with the DRU include: It's refusal to drive away unless it's been tipped, it's consistent snacking on the customers delivery and a propensity to hack into small hatch backs in order to drive them.
Despite the hiccups, Domino's CEO Don Meij stated that they will:
"…continue to develop a range of innovations set to revolutionise the entire pizza ordering experience... whether that's providing underwhelming side dishes, puzzling and excessive topping choices or investing in advanced robotics and AI... pizza is here to stay."
Yippee Ki-Roast, Mother F@$%ers! Bruce Willis Is Comedy Central's Next Roastee!
“This ain’t the first time I’ll be tied to a chair and held hostage by a group of humorless assholes for a couple hours,” - B. Willis.
Celebrate Pi Day By Winning Tickets To Jonathan Pie's Live Show!
It's a day to celebrate pi, eat lots of pie, and win tickets to Jonathan Pie! You're welcome.
Tell Us Your Most Extreme Fast Food Combo & Win Tickets To Jim Gaffigan's Live Stand Up Show!
What's the craziest junk food combination you can think of? Get creative and you could win a double pass to his latest show!
Comedy Central is Bringing Back the Ultimate Comedy Festival: Clusterfest
The three day festival of comedy, music, installations that is the ultimate Clusterfu-fest...
12 Questions With Guy Williams
NZ Comedian Guy Williams loves (and hates) being interviewed... here are some more thoughts from him on that very topic.
12 Questions With Rose Matafeo
Ahead of our festival in NZ, we asked Rose Matafeo some questions about comedy, comedy and comedy...
11 Questions with Guy Montgomery
Curious about the life of a comedian? Here are 11 questions we asked to get some insights ahead of our festival across NZ!
Guess Jimmy Carr’s One Liners and Win Tickets to his Live Stand Up Show!
How well do you know Jimmy Carr’s comedy? Find out and you could win a double pass to his latest show!
NZ is Getting A Summer Comedy Festival...
Hold on to your jaws… Comedy Central is presenting a comedy festival In New Zealand across four big nights.
Fans of The Big Lez Show Voted on the next Spin Off... Here are the Results!
We asked you which character should get a spin off and your answers were skitz…
Spot The Toy & Win Some Of LoveHoney's Broad City Goodies
Think you know your lipsticks from your pocket rockets? Take our challenge and you could win a whole bunch of Broad City sex toys…
The Jim Jefferies Shows Podcast Is Out!
You read right… Jim Jefferies has launched a podcast series based off his Comedy Central show The Jim Jefferies Show.