Grumpy Old Man Accepts "Kids These Days"
Henry Graham has been a grumpy old man for most of the past 15 years of his life. The past decade has seen his grumpiness rise to significantly high levels as the old man lived through the rise of Web 2.0, obnoxious social media platforms and a general deterioration in many of the conservative ideals he valued throughout his life.
The transforming world around him saw Mr Graham regularly use the expression “kids these days” and “back in my day” to complain constantly to his children and grand children about things which pissed him off.
However this week the 92 year old turned a new page and admitted he no longer feels animosity towards the younger generations and their “obnoxious bull shit”. Henry has said he will stop glaring, frowning and huffing at school kids, yuppies and migrants. Instead he will focus on reading more books and making peace with the world around him.
“Kids these days actually seem pretty clued in to what’s going on, they have the Internet which gives them access to an enormous amount of information. Back in… I mean, when I was younger, we just had books. So it’s a pretty amazing time to be alive.”
With his newfound optimism, Mr Graham has taken up new hobbies (such as bird watching) and started writing a novel about his life and the passing away of his wife (15 years prior).
“Ever since Angela passed away I’ve been carrying a weight with me and an immense amount of anger. Anger is a lot like holding a burning coal, you're only hurting yourself. I think getting old makes you look at life the same way an old eagle would look over the plains towards the end of its life… flying in the sky by itself, reminiscing about the days it used to hunt field mice… that makes sense right?”
Our reporter wasn’t entirely sure, but here at Comedy Central, we commend Henry Graham for committing to being a fun loving 90 year old instead of a grumpy old man.
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